i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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