just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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