You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
