you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize