his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
