Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize