im drinking this country out of the recession.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
