I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize
