so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize