meet me or not, i'm out of control
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
