he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
