Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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