Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
