Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Randomize
