I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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