no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
