I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
