VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize