Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
