I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
