Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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