Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
How's work?
Spinning.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
