And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Randomize
