no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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