Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
