I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
then he tried to convert me to islam
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
