i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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