Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
