I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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