Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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