If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Are these your boobs on my camera?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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