she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
