what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I don't �care how much you're grieving �a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.�
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
