Sry I called you an 8
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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