I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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