so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
