i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I just blew my weed a kiss
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
