Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
if i can run in heels then i can drive
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
