I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
