i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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