I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
