My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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