physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
