he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
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