According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
