i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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