so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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