I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
