after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize