obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."�
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize